#43 Our relationship with and Mindset Towards Food with Amanda, T1D Nutritionist

Katie: 0:00

This is episode 43 of the sugar mamas podcast. And today I get to talk with Amanda Amanda is known as T one D nutritionist on Instagram, and she's been a registered dietician for the past five years. She's also an author of a book that was just published called the caregiver's guide to diabetes. Practical advice for caring for you and your loved one. Not only that, but Amanda has been living with type one diabetes for the past. 10 years. Amanda is passionate about helping people manage type one without destroying the relationship with, or their mindset towards food. And that is what we're going to talk about today. Enjoy. You're listening to the sugar mamas podcast, a show designed for moms and caregivers of type one diabetics here. You'll find a community of like-minded people who are striving daily to keep their kids safe, happy, and healthy in the ever-changing world of type one. I'm your host and fellow T one D mom, Katie Roseboro. Before we get started. I need you to know that nothing you hear on the sugar mamas podcast should be considered medical advice. Please be safe, be smart, and always consult your physician before making changes to the way you manage type one diabetes. Thanks. Hey everybody. I am here with Amanda today. And Amanda, I would like for you first to introduce yourself to the listeners and tell everybody your connection to.

Amanda: 1:42

Yeah. So my name is Amanda bridge. I'm also known as. T one D dot nutritionist on Instagram. I have been a registered dietician for almost five years now, which is absolutely crazy to me. And I have been living with type one for almost 10 years now, which is even crazier to me. I was diagnosed with type one when I was 18. I was a senior in high school. So that was a pretty. Tricky transition to say the least. It changed a lot of my plans. I, but it ultimately led me to finding passion for nutrition. And led me to where I'm at today, where I just wrote a book for caregivers, for people with diabetes. And I work with type ones and their families to help them manage blood sugars without giving up foods that they love.

Katie: 2:44

Oh, that's awesome. I love. all of those. I want to ask you about your book a little bit later in the episode. But because that's pretty, that's like your newest project. I feel like that was exciting news when you announced your book. But could you tell us a little bit more about your diagnosis story? Cause I just feel. I mean, there's never a good time to get diagnosed with type one, but I feel like you were like at a very pivotal point in time in your life. You're kind of this teen young adult getting ready to launch off into this independent college life. So tell, just tell us a little bit more about what it was like.

Amanda: 3:16

Yeah, it was, it was really tough. I was very, I was very responsible young adult. I was already taking college level classes during like my senior year of high school. I was really excited to, you know, go off to like this big university and really like dive into my studies. then I got hit with. Diagnosis. And didn't really know anyone with type one, didn't know anyone with even diabetes in general. And it was incredibly overwhelming because I was sitting in the ER for, I think it was like it was something ridiculous, like 10 hours, because the upstairs was pretty much fighting on whether or not I should be treated as a pediatric or if I should be treated as an. 'cause I, it was two weeks after my 18th birthday. So I ended up getting admitted to the pediatric floor, but seen by adult endocrinology.

Katie: 4:14

Okay.

Amanda: 4:15

Yes. But it was, I think adult endocrinology is a very different world than pediatric endocrinology. There's very little handholding, lovey Debbie kind of stuff that happens with adult endocrinology. They're very like, these are the facts. This is what you're going to do. This is what you have to do. I was discharged on vials and syringes two weeks after I had, you know, my follow-up appointment with my endo. I know how to use Google. I'm 18, you know? I Google, you know, type one diabetes and I find insulin pens. I'm like, oh, this is amazing. I don't want to sit here and like flick this syringe. And I go to my endo and she's just like, you have to wear a pump, you have to wear a CGM. And I was like, what? Like it. Really freaked me out because I wasn't the most confident in my body. And at 18 it was like a weird age still with like body changes and stuff. So I was just like, I left that appointment and I was sad. Sobbing and my end, delicious like, well, this is what you have to do. So you're going to just have to, you know, get over it. And I ended up switching endos multiple times, but I ended up waiting two years to get on a CGM because I was really, really afraid of wearing a device on me.

Katie: 5:42

Wow. That's crazy. Do you, I mean, do you wish you could go back in time and tell your newly diagnosed self? Like, just go ahead and get on that CGM,

Amanda: 5:50

Yes. And no, like now I do. I really think that it was a good experience for me because. I was able to build a lot of body trust with myself. During those times being able to feel what high blood sugar is, being able to feel what a low blood sugar is. And I was also incredibly stressed out. I was going through a lot of life changes, and I think if I saw my numbers and arrows and all that stuff, so early on, it would have added a lot of extra pressure already on top of. All the things I was trying to figure out.

Katie: 6:28

Yeah. I mean, I can't relate to that cause I'm not in T one D but just my little nine-year-old daughter. Like she, she used to have the clarity app, the Dexcom clarity app on her phone along of course, with the Dexcom app. And she came to me one day and she's like, mommy, I have to take this off my phone. And I was like, oh, okay, what's going on? And she's like, every time I open it up, it just stresses me out. Not obviously she couldn't take the Dexcom app off of her phone, but just the clarity app of, know, like seeing the averages and. I feel like we were doing a pretty good job. So, you know, in her little mind, it just like, I think it just was too much information, especially for her nine-year-old self. And she just found that she was like looking at it too much. So, I mean, I, I can definitely see where it could be uh, an, an issue,

Amanda: 7:15

Yeah, it's, it's a devil. It's definitely a double-edged sword because CGM technology is great and it's lovely. And I love seeing newly diagnosed families being able to get on them really quickly, because that wasn't always the case before. But then at the same time, you know, your care team usually just says, yeah, where this is going to be super awesome. You know, you're going to be able to see your blood sugars all the time. But they don't realize you're going to be able to see your blood sugars all the time and how much anxiety and emotion and lost sleep goes into seeing all those numbers, literally all the time.

Katie: 7:55

Yeah. I've had to set boundaries for myself, which I think I'm going to do an episode about this just separately. Just about setting boundaries with like how often I look at the Dexcom app. Um, you know, just things like that, just to kind of protect my own uh, mental health, I guess you could say. So. Okay. So you were diagnosed, right? Kind of right at the point in time. where you're like, thinking about what I want to do as a career, where do I want my life to be headed? So did your diagnosis kind of motivate you to go into like the dietetics and become a registered dietician? Do you think you would've done that if you hadn't been diagnosed with.

Amanda: 8:33

not.

Katie: 8:34

Yeah.

Amanda: 8:34

I always loved science. Science was always like my favorite thing. In, in high school I took like an anatomy and physiology class for fun. Like people were taking like arts and crafts ceramics as like their electives. I took anatomy.

Katie: 8:48

Yeah.

Amanda: 8:49

I applied everywhere, everywhere. I applied to college, I applied as like a general Bible major. Didn't really know exactly what I wanted to do with that, but I knew I loved science and. Ultimately, I had a sit down conversation with my parents. I realized that going to school out of state was not the best decision for me. that's where I refused. I didn't even want to go to school in the state of New Jersey. So I applied everywhere out of state

Katie: 9:16

Hmm.

Amanda: 9:16

got this big diagnosis in February. So I missed the cutoff date to enroll for in state college. So again, had the sit down conversation with my parents and we were like, you know, probably best if you stay home and go to community college. Cause they had like a rolling admit. So I was like, all right, whatever, I'll do that. So that's what I did. And when I went to orientation, they had different types of majors and stuff, and one of them was nutritional science and I was just like, wow, like, you know, I'm learning a lot about nutrition right now. And it's science-based so I was just like, let me try this and I'm going to have to take all my bio's and sciences anyway. So I was. Let me try this. If it, I can always change it. So I did that and they're actually one of the only community colleges in New Jersey that had a nutritional science major. So I feel like in the grand scheme of things, I was really angry about having Tino changed my whole life plan because of my diagnosis. But looking back, I feel like. The universe sometimes works in very mysterious ways. if I hadn't had this diagnosis, if I haven't had to make the decision to go to community college, like I never would have found this major. It never would have been something on my radar at all.

Katie: 10:48

Hmm. Hmm. That's so interesting. I mean, are you, so from there, you, you know, you finished your degree. Did you transition out of community college or how did their path go? Yeah.

Amanda: 10:59

Yeah. So the. Community college. I went to how to program with Rutgers university. So I went there, my bachelor's degree, then to be a dietician, you have to complete internship kind of like clinical hours rotations, like nurses, doctors, any healthcare professionals have to do. So I did that and I did an accelerated master's program with university of Rhode Island. So about six years worth this school in my pocket. And then I was finally a fresh graduate, ready to go out, change the change, the world of nutrition. And I'm getting a diabetes educator job is incredibly difficult. There's not. Positions out there. Most hospitals have only a handful of educators and they usually stay there forever. So I actually started my journey working in long-term care in nursing homes. And I love my grandmas and grandpas. I love that setting. It was really, it was really great. But I didn't feel like I was doing fulfilling it. Didn't like. You know, like if it felt great, but something was still missing. And ultimately when COVID hit and there was like a big shift in the online space I was laid off from my job and I was just like, you know what? This is a great opportunity for me to kind of go ahead and try this. And again, I feel, I don't think I would have ever been happy to get laid off from a job before, but again, I think. Has this plan for us. And it was like the stepping stone to get me to where I am now. And it's literally the best job I have ever had.

Katie: 12:46

Yeah. So perfect segue because my next question was, I want to know about your job now, because I know you're not working at a nursing home anymore. You're are a, you have your own online coaching business. And as you said, in the introduction, you kind of help and their caregivers just manage their blood sugars while also not totally ruining their relationship with food. So tell us more.

Amanda: 13:11

So when I was diagnosed, I felt like a lot of things with traditional diabetes management comes out very well intended, you know like we obviously don't want our blood sugars high all the time. Right. And they tell us that it might lead to these complicated. But then every time we have a high blood sugar, all we think about is our big toe falling off, or we're going to go blind every time we see a certain blood sugar number and. So, what I do when I'm working with clients is working through the anxieties that we face, the emotional responses that come along with being diabetic and how well they can really shift their mindset to get out of that, like black and white thinking. That is usually what we're taught with traditional approaches to diabetes. Now.

Katie: 14:01

You work with people of all ages.

Amanda: 14:03

So usually if they're like really young, I mostly work with parents because they're the ones feeding and dosing and all of that stuff. But yeah,

Katie: 14:13

Okay. Wow. So really I'm just asking, because if somebody listening right now is like Mimi, I need some help. They can, can, what's the best way to contact you. Like I know obviously Instagram. Okay.

Amanda: 14:25

Instagram my website um, my websites, T1 D nutritionist.com. Super easy to remember.

Katie: 14:31

Yeah, that is super easy. Okay, awesome. I'm just curious to know how your like structure works. Do you usually meet with people once a week or once a month, or just kind of let them decide how often they want to meet?

Amanda: 14:43

I have different levels of coaching. I try to be very flexible um, because I know how important accessibility and affordability is considering how much money we are spending on our suppliers and health insurance. And I, when I started doing this, I never wanted someone to have to choose between. Their insulin and working with me. So I try to have a wide variety of options for people wherever they're at in their journey. However, I can help them.

Katie: 15:17

That's awesome. So based on, following you on social media and I've talked with you a couple of times before, but I know you're really passionate about. Wanting people to eat for their overall health and not just for their diabetes. And I'm having grown up myself with just body images use. And I would say there was definitely a point in time in my life where I had a pur a pretty unhealthy relationship with food. Like I am definitely all for that as well. You know, when my daughter got diagnosed, I kind of. I immediately thought like, oh my goodness, this is going to be so overwhelming. And maybe bring back for me some like bad habits that I used to have in the past about like obsessing over food and not so much calories in this case, but like carbs. And so, know, when somebody told me, I don't even remember who the first person was, I actually think it was the, uh, diabetes educators in the hospital, you know, just, you don't have to restrict her diet Reason, of course, like probably, probably not a great idea to sit down and eat like a dozen donuts, but you know what I mean? Like can eat what she wants. You just have to learn to manage the insulin. I just remember breathing like just this huge sigh of relief of, okay, we can do this. It's probably not gonna be easy, but like, there is a way to not completely turn our life upside down and So it kind of, where did that come from? For you did, did that, did your passion surrounding that mindset kind of come from personal experience or did you just notice it was a huge problem in the T one D community?

Amanda: 16:54

Yeah. So it was something that I also experienced personally. As I mentioned, I went straight into adult endocrinology and this was pre Dexcom days and all that stuff. So I would go with like my food and blood sugar journal, my educator would have a red pen and circle every single blood sugar that was out of. And then ask me, why did I eat that I should have eaten X food instead? it was a very black and white approach instead of talking to me about why I was choosing certain foods or how to dose for those foods differently, it was. It felt like I was failing and I'm a very type, a perfectionist mentality person already. So I, I hated leaving appointments because I felt like I was doing such a bad job. So I was just like, okay. So if potatoes are, what's making my blood sugar high, then I'm just not going to eat potatoes. So soon, it just slowly started like building and building and building where I was really just eating chicken and broccoli. I was eating like all like the keto ish foods. And then there would like come times where I just couldn't couldn't do it anymore. And I would eat like a whole box of cereal almost. And then I'd be like, oh, well, my sugar is like three, 400. So back to chicken and broccoli tomorrow. And I'm like, well, this is like, it would give me like, reason why I wasn't allowing myself to eat those foods to begin with because I have no control and my sugar goes high. So I was in this really bad cycle for a very long time. It was a years and one day it was with my family at a Portuguese restaurant and they had like a family style and, you know, they have like the rice and the veggies and the potatoes and the bread and all this stuff. And like, you go there with like the intention of like, you have dinner for like the next three days. When I tell you I ate all of my food, plus my sisters. And I'm still sitting there with like the extra bread, like dipping it in the sauce. My sister looked at me and was like, you okay? And I was just like that, like, my sister kind of did it to me, like kind of snarky. But at that moment I was just like, no, like what I'm doing is like, so incredibly self-destructive. So at that point, I was R I was, I graduated with a degree in nutrition, I was like learning all this stuff about nutrition, which was also incredibly black and white, then tied with the education that I had about diabetes. I was just like, Nothing I can eat, can ever be unhealthy. Right. And I was stuck. And that was like the moment that triggered me to really start focusing on, you know, if I want to eat bread, what can I add to that rather than being like, Nope, I'm never going to eat bread again. How can I balance that out for my blood sugars? For what I know helps promote your overall health, my satiety, all of those things, rather than. Never eating it again and then wanting to eat literally the whole entire bread basket that's sitting right in front of me.

Katie: 20:16

Yeah. Again, don't have the T one D experience, but just, I, a couple of years ago, I decided like, I'm not, I'm not going to say to myself, like, oh, I can't have this anymore. Or even like, I'm not going to do a restrictive diet for, even if it's just like a 30 day thing. That just is not healthy for me. Because I'm a very like all or nothing type of personality too. And then like, of course, if you fail, then you feel all the skills. And so I just kind of made up my mind a couple of years ago. Like, I'm all done with that. All done. I think that as you get older, that's just kind of naturally happens with most people. It seems, which is good. We just care less. But, you know, I just kinda decided like, I'm gonna. I'm going to eat healthy foods. Luckily I love a lot of healthy foods. I'm going to exercise. Luckily I love exercising too. Not crazy amounts, but like, you know, just movement. I love movement. And um, and if I want to have, you know, a treat or go out to eat or it's, it's not. Ruined my mindset or ruin my day or anything like that. Like, so I feel like I've been in a much healthier mindset over the past couple of years, but I love that you kind of you're, it seems like your whole coaching business kind of folk circles around letting people have a healthy relationship with food and not telling people they can't eat this, or they can't eat that or chastising them when. When they do um, you know, have a quote unquote bad, bad day. So how do you coach people out of that, where do you even start? All right. We have come to the middle of the episode and it's time for me to tell you guys about the product of the week. This week's product is yum viz, complete glucose gummies. When Sarah was first diagnosed, we tried glucose tabs, but quickly realized that those are absolutely disgusting. No offense to people who love glucose. But I wanted to have an option for her that she liked, but that she didn't love that way. I could send her to school with it, and I wouldn't be too concerned about her just like snacking on them throughout the day. So these glucose gummies, I will leave an affiliate link to them in the show notes. They're the ones that we've used and tried. They're yummy. They're delicious. They're coded in like, I guess it's sugar on the outside. Each gummy has two grams of carbs, so you can treat lows reasonably without spiking blood. Plus these particular gummies are gluten-free vegan and kosher. Check them out, link in the show notes. I also wanted to remind you guys that now there's a no strings attached way to support the show through buy me a coffee. Your gift can be a one-time donation, or you can sign up for our fund membership levels. We have the bronze bolus, which is $1 a month. There's the silver sugars, which is $3 a month. The golden glucose, which is $5 a month. And then there's the diamond dire buddy level at $10 a month. Every single cent earned through buy me a coffee. Donations will go to the equipment, the software in the virtual space required to get this show up and running each and every week. I want to give a huge shout out to the two supporters that signed up last week. So two Hannigan and Shannon. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I cannot thank you enough. I appreciate it so much. You can check it out at www dot. Buy me a coffee.com forward slash sugar mama. Or you can head to the podcast website and take a look at it there. www.sugarmommaspodcast.com. Plus I'll leave a link to it in the show notes. Thanks you guys now back to the show.

Amanda: 23:52

It's different for everyone depending on where the restriction is coming from. Is it coming from years of chronic dieting? Like on and off chronic dieting? Is it. Because of their body weight, any medical trauma that they have experienced. what we focus on can really vary, but usually the journey has just about the same. It's having them really understand what nutrition is

Katie: 24:24

Yeah.

Amanda: 24:24

because whoever created this standard, this story that, you know, they're telling themselves. That's like bread is bad. It says, who says, who, told you that bread? Bread is bad, that you should never eat bread? it because you ate red ones and your blood sugar went high? Is it acceptable for you to say that every time you eat a food and your sugar goes high, that you should never eat that food? Because I know I eat a lot of healthy foods and sometimes my blood sugar goes high. Doesn't mean I'm never gonna to. Watermelon again, I'm going to take that into consideration and adjust my dosing appropriately. And when you shift your mindset to like a better place of more abundance, it helps you feel at ease with your diagnosis and at ease around food because you no longer putting yourself in this like tiny little box. Because if you go out to eat and you're like, can't eat that, can't eat that can't eat that can't eat. That can't eat that that's not fun, but you can go to a restaurant and be like, okay, if this is what I want, do I want the burger with the fries? Do I want the bun? Is, am I, will I be satisfied without the bond? Can I. Do I want the French fries today? Do I, could I maybe sub vegetables, it's opening up this whole conversation about what you want and how those foods will make you feel because it's going to change day to day and an experience to experience. And we're the only ones that can be the judge of what is satisfying and what our bodies needs, rather than a piece of paper that you. Five years ago. That's like, Nope, no bread, no, this, no that. And. I think it's incredibly empowering to be able to go to a restaurant and feel that confidence of being like, you know what I can go in, and this is what I want. This is how I'm going to dose for it. And even if they don't get the desired outcome, it doesn't ruin the experience. It's just a learning experience for them and more data to take home so they can work through it the next time, rather than being discouraged from not getting it. The first time.

Katie: 26:44

Absolutely. try to think. I try to remind myself of that all the time. Like, okay, what did we learn? What do we learn from this that did not go that well? So what, how, what can we do differently? How can we adjust? You know, I'm, I feel like I'm pretty sure. Stubborn and competitive. So when we do have like a bad experience with food, I'm like, Oh, I will not let this win. You know, grapes, you will not defeat me. I will.

Amanda: 27:08

Oh, my gosh grapes are, I just bought some cotton candy grapes, and I'm like sitting here and I'm like, I'll just like, have like two or three as I'm like putting some like in like a measuring cup. And I'm like, what am I like blood sugar? Keep going high. And I'm like, oh, because I probably ate a serving before I even like measured them out. So grapes are

Katie: 27:32

My

Amanda: 27:32

they come up and sneak up on you.

Katie: 27:34

It's probably one of her favorite foods. She loves grapes. I put them in her lunch all the time.

Amanda: 27:38

They're So good.

Katie: 27:39

yeah, they are so in cotton candy grapes, especially actually, I had never had a cotton candy grape until like a year and a half ago, somebody was like, a cotton candy grade. I'm like, what are you talking about? And They're like, they taste like cotton candy and they really do taste like cotton candy. amazing.

Amanda: 27:53

Yeah.

Katie: 27:54

All right. Something that I love that you do that I've seen you do a lot is I like to call it flipping the. Where you basically take maybe. In terms of like a caregiver like myself, like something that a caregiver might say to their type one diabetic, you kind of, you kind of will take like, okay, instead of saying this, which is usually something very negative or judgmental try saying this, and I've also seen you do it with like the mindset of an actual T one D like, if you're sitting in front of plate of food or, you know, you're starting your day, like, okay. Instead of saying this or having this mindset, try flipping it. Okay. Doing this. so I asked Amanda to come with some of her favorite the script, a text to share with us. Cause I think it's good. to have little mantras to repeat to yourself during the day it helps.

Amanda: 28:45

Yeah. so it it's so incredibly helpful because where with diabetes for the long haul. So if we're not being nice to ourselves, whether we're caregivers of people with diabetes or have diabetes ourselves, it's going to create a really negative space. And we're going to hold that weight. We're going to resent ourselves, resent diabetes. That's. Not a fun, fun thing to carry around with you. So um, I have a couple of here. So one is, if you're saying that's a good or bad blood sugar, try saying your blood sugar is in or out of range, your blood sugar is high or. You're going to start utilizing language that is based on facts when you're using the good or bad language, associating. Oh, if I'm at this number, you know, that's really good and I need to stay there, but sugars don't have a value. They're not an outlook on you. So if we're able to adjust the facts with what that number is and what that means you don't have to hold that emotion every time you see it. Granted, some numbers are definitely triggering. They do trigger an emotional response, right? Like you see a number and it's really high. It's almost like your, your heart kind of drops to your stomach. And you're like, oh my God, am I God, my God. we have the tools in our toolbox. We have our little snacks, we have our insulin, we know what to do. And if we're able to create just a little bit of space those blood sugar numbers, it really helps us in the long run. If you're saying, why does your blood sugar keep going high? What are you doing? This is for parents. Maybe like their kids are like sneaking snacks or something. Try saying this instead. I noticed your blood sugar is going high in the afternoon. Can we talk about that?

Katie: 30:40

Okay.

Amanda: 30:40

for permission rather than jumping the gun and being. Why are you going hi? Like,

Katie: 30:48

Yeah.

Amanda: 30:48

are you doing? It's going to place blame on that rather than when I work with parents. like them to have meetings their type one, because you guys are a team. guys got to work together having regular sit-down meetings outside of the endo office. Can really help you guys establish trust and communication. your child doesn't want to go and sneaks back they are, you know, don't they feel comfortable enough to tell you because if you're the one dosing, you know, you, you want to dose them if they're hungry. So how can you guys have improved communication? So instead of. Coming at them, they might get defensive, might get closed off. If you open up the conversation as like teamwork that like you're their team player, you're their advocate. It can really open up that communication between both of them. So for parents oftentimes we're incredibly focused on carbohydrates. So if you're saying, Nope, can't eat that too many carbs to do something. Try saying, would you like to eat insert vegetable, insert fruit along with that? So if they want to eat something carby how can we balance that out? How can we offer in addition to the meal to the snack, rather than taking it away completely.

Katie: 32:26

And now the idea behind that is because like something like protein or something that involves fiber would kind of help to prevent like a bigger spike, if something was really processed. Is that what you mean?

Amanda: 32:36

Yeah. Yeah. So if they wanted potato chips, right. It could be really easy for them to fill up on a whole bag of potato chips because there's really no fiber. There's some fat, but there's nothing else to really keep them full. But if you're serving the potato chips around, along with some dip and some veggies and make it into like little platter. It can help them again, go back to like their overall health. You can add color that health has more fiber and vitamins and minerals and all this fun stuff, and at least you're offering it for them.

Katie: 33:12

I, there was a little, there was a time there after Sarah was diagnosed where I was almost swinging too far in the opposite direction of being like, You can have that. Absolutely. You can have that, like, just wanting to like um, trying to try a little too hard to let her know that like she can. Eat like she did before. But then I kind of realized that like, wait, but this isn't how she ate before, because I've never been the kind of mom that was like, sure, sweetheart, like, let's have, you know, three cinnamon rolls and a giant glass of orange juice. Like. I was, I was never that type of mom I mean, I let them have those things, but I'm you know, like let's just have one and then a cup of orange juice, or like trying to teach them that, like, you can have these things, but we need to also some self control. And this was like long before diagnosis or like, Yeah. like, oh, well you already have. You know, a goal goldfish as a snack today. Like why don't we have a piece of fruit instead this time? Or, you know, just trying to teach them like balance within their diet. that was me before diagnosis And then after diagnosis, I, all of a sudden realized that I was like overcompensating for. You know, just not wanting her to feel like restricted. And I'm like, wait, wait, like we need to go back to basics a little bit. Like, you know, it's not a free for all, all the time. And that has nothing to do with diabetes. That's just like overall healthy for you as a human, like you have to take care of your body because we do only get one.

Amanda: 34:43

Yeah. And sometimes as parents, we get that um, Our role during the all times and snack times is we were the food providers, right? So if they want something for dinner, it is well within our boundaries to say, that's not on the menu tonight, maybe tomorrow, maybe for lunch, maybe for this. It's not saying no. Per se it's just no, not right now. And that slight bit of optimism sometimes can help limit the food fight that we're having with our kids. And I see time and time again with type one parents. And if their kid doesn't eat dinner and then they start freaking out of like, oh my God, I have to, you know, go and make them a whole new meal because now they have insulin and all that stuff. And. That's a lot. That's a lot for you already just slaved over a meal and working and, you know, doing all of your other, like family role duties then go and be a short order cook. That's all a lot of pressure on you. And then to, you know, freak out because there's insulin and it just is, it can get really stressful and messy for every one involved. So I don't think that aspect is really. Talked about either of like, oh my God, what do I, what do you need them to do? But what I ended up encouraging my families to do is like a low blood sugar isn't gonna happen right away. Cause insulin takes a very long time. You can offer them, you know, do you want this. Don't let them have a free for all in the kitchen, because they're going to of course ask for was Anya after you just slaved over a meal who's going to want to cook lasagna after you just cooked for an hour or something. So if you're able to give them one or two options, it limits the stress everyone can kind of go along with their meal.

Katie: 36:45

I don't know when this started in our lives, but my husband. Is always like bananas, just, he thinks bananas and water are like magical. Like you have a headache, you need to drink some water and need a banana. You, you know, you're tired, drink some water have money and I go to bed. Like, so if ever our kids, cause I've never been the type of mom to like cater to my kids, like w with what they want to eat. I mean, with dinner, at least I'm like, no, this is what I cooked and this is what we're eating. So I did worry about that. Like, oh gosh, what if all of a sudden. So it goes on this huge rebellion and it's like, well, I'm not eating it, my husband, you know, consistent with the bananas, he's like, you can have a banana. So if ever there's a meal. where she's like, you know, she'll eat like a couple bites and like, I don't want anymore. It's like, well, go get you a banana. I don't know. Bananas are just our thing. Like, but I, if it, if it's a toddler toddlers, you can't reason with a toddler. So I can't. Yeah. In that case, I guess you'd have to give them like more choices just because you don't want them to crash. Of course. But

Amanda: 37:46

Yeah, it's, it's really tricky. But the last one that I have um, is I'm such a bad parent for letting their blood sugar goes so high. And instead of saying that, try saying that diabetes is a hard condition to manage, and I'm doing the best that I can when we're able to speak to ourselves. It opens up so many doors for us and it's incredibly, it's incredibly hard, you know, I had blood sugars and I'm like, why the hell would I do that? Why did I eat that? You know? But when I'm encouraging families to think about how to talk to themselves cleanly, when they're first starting out, talk to yourself, how you would talk to another two and D family.

Katie: 38:31

Mm.

Amanda: 38:32

You were just like, you know what? Sarah blood sugar is a hot mess. You're like, you know, coming to me and you're just like, oh my God, I am such a bad mom. I can't do anything. Right. No matter what I do, she keeps going hi, would it be helpful for me to be like, you know what, you're right. You're doing a real bad job. I wouldn't let her see that. I would never ever say that. So why do we say that to ourselves? We are always our own biggest critic, but when we're able to, you know, take the time, assess the facts, use it as a learning experience and truly be kind to ourselves. It really makes managing, living and supporting someone with a chronic condition to stumble a little bit easier.

Katie: 39:19

Yeah. I, I think that's great advice. Like you need to talk to yourself and in your type one, how you, you know, it's like the golden rule, you treat others and you talk to others, how you want to be. Treated and talked to, and Yeah, nobody likes to be lectured to, or nagged at, or, you know, bossed around just, it's not gonna well in the relationship. That's kind of all, all you're doing all the time. I have a general rule for myself that I do not say any if like it was a high sugar day for Sarah, or even a low blood sugar day, because we've had some really rough days that I was like, oh my gosh, she's low again. She's low. Again, like it's or it can be just as frustrating as highs in my opinion. But I with school specifically, when she's been away from me all day, I'm just. I just don't say anything like she gets in the car and even if it's been a high day or a low day, a frustrating I'll call it a frustrating day. She, she usually, when she gets in the car, she's happy as clam. Like she it's, it's not affecting her at all. um, and part of me is. like, great. I'm glad it did not her little mindset and that she's still positive. But I just uh, I have a rule that I don't say anything and I wait until. Later that night to kind of like, you know what I'm talking you're in, or even like a couple of days later, like, Hey, remember, on this day, like you went low a couple of times, like what, you know, I don't know. I just, I wait to approach it until like hours. And sometimes days later where, you know, I've had a chance to kind of take some deep breaths and calm down and way I'm not like railing into her the second.

Amanda: 41:03

Yeah.

Katie: 41:03

Into the car and I feel

Amanda: 41:05

Yeah,

Katie: 41:06

And then

Amanda: 41:06

it is.

Katie: 41:07

I need even need to talk to her about something. And then I'm like, well, shoot. Okay, well I'm sure it'll come up again. Well,

Amanda: 41:12

Yeah. Yeah. It's a lie. It's, especially when they're so young, if you're constantly like huffing and puffing, every time you check a blood sugar, your kids are smart. They, they watch every. Move every word that parents are saying, they pick up on a lot of things. So if they're hearing you like, oh my God, like again, like then when they're old enough to check their blood sugars and really like, you know, things start clicking for them. That's the mentality that they're going to have around their bloods. And we want to set them up to have as much of a caring and compassionate relationship with themselves and their diabetes as possible.

Katie: 42:01

Yeah, absolutely. will you tell us before we sign off, will you tell us a little bit about your book? I want to,

Amanda: 42:08

Yeah. So when I was writing, I wrote this book earlier this year and. Because I was diagnosed at 18. I was the one that took on my management. My parents, my parents learned how to do like three injections and then they never did it ever again. So I really took on the weight of things. So I wasn't ever really exposed to how diabetes impacts our loved ones, people that are supporting us. So when I had the opportunity to write this book, It really opened my eyes for how diabetes truly impacts everyone involved. The book itself is geared more towards adults that are diagnosed with diabetes, but there are a lot of takeaways that could be helpful for parents of young ones, but it was an incredibly eye-opening experience because. Diabetes does doesn't impact your child or the person living with it. It impacts every single person involved and being able to walk through, you know, what diabetes is, what to anticipate with some of the lifestyle changes that come with it and how we have this added layer of like decision making that we have to make throughout the day. It was incredibly eyeopening to me. And I'm incredibly thankful that I had the opportunity to bring out a resource like that to the community.

Katie: 43:33

Yeah. And so how did you go? Did you just interview a bunch of caregivers or how did you go about kind of collecting the information for it?

Amanda: 43:42

A lot of research. There are a lot of research and platforms about caring for someone with diabetes. So it was a lot of that. A lot of research articles. I was reading about how our support team can impact someone's management with diabetes. And a lot of it was just a lot of stories that I have heard from. Patients and clients over the years of how their support team has helped them. A lot of things that I can even like call my mom and like ask my boyfriend questions. he wakes up the other day a couple of months ago. I though I thought I had like a, some really excellent idea because Starbucks came out with. Like

Katie: 44:27

Yeah.

Amanda: 44:27

people starters. And I was like, oh my God, this is going to be like, life-changing low stack. Right. So I put them in like my bedside table and literally it was the dumbest idea I've ever had because at like 3:00 AM and my decks come screaming at me. I'm like clammy, sweaty, shaky. I'm in the dark. And I can't open the wrapper.

Katie: 44:49

no.

Amanda: 44:51

So I'm like smacking my boyfriend and I'm like, please help. Like, so he's like sitting up and I'm like, unwrapping like unwrapping the Starburst. And it's like little things like that. Like you never really realized how incredibly helpful it is until, you know, you look back and see like, wow, like there's a lot of things that he does to support me every day inside, inside my journeys. I give a big, big, thank you to everyone, whether their significant others, partners, parents step parents, grandparents, whoever it is that helps support people with diabetes, because it's a lot for us to carry on our own and to really our needs. And think of us is incredibly refreshing.

Katie: 45:49

Well, that's very sweet of you to say thank you. Thanks for writing the book. I, I feel like I don't. Did you say that? What's it, what's the title of it? I mean, I don't know if he shared that with.

Amanda: 45:57

it's called the caregiver's guide to diabetes. Practical advice for supporting your loved one. it's available on Amazon.

Katie: 46:07

Oh, my favorite place to shop makes it easy. Just click a button. It's dangerous.

Amanda: 46:13

It's incredibly dangerous. That is true.

Katie: 46:17

Yup. Exactly. Well, thank you so much for coming on today, Amanda. Thank you. for taking the time out Of your day to chat with me. I really appreciate it.

Amanda: 46:25

Thank you.

Katie: 46:26

You're very welcome. And hopefully I'll chat with you again soon, wherever, whether that's on social media or whatever it may be.

Amanda: 46:34

Of course. Thanks for having me.

Katie: 46:41

All right. That is it for our show today. I hope you guys enjoyed that episode as always. I will leave a link to everything in the show notes where you can find Amanda on social media, in the internet, as well as where you can find her book. Again, the title of it is the caregiver's guide to diabetes, practical advice for caring for you and your loved one super exciting news for the show. The podcast has a new website. Same domain. Just a new look. You can check it out at www dot sugar, mamas podcast.com. I hope you guys have a fabulous week. Bye.